10 Psychological Facts About Cheating

Cheating is a complicated subject that affects many relationships. 

People often wonder why someone would betray their partner or risk a relationship they care about. 

The reasons behind cheating aren’t always as simple as not caring or wanting out of the relationship. 

There are often deeper feelings and motivations that lead people down this path, and understanding these can shed light on a confusing and painful experience.

Psychology helps explain some of the patterns and reasons why people cheat. For many, it can come down to unmet needs, impulse control, or even personal insecurities. 

Each situation is unique, but knowing some common psychological reasons behind cheating can help people better understand themselves and their relationships. 

1. Cheating Can Stem from Emotional Needs Not Being Met

One common reason people cheat is because their emotional needs aren’t being fulfilled in the relationship. 

It doesn’t always mean the relationship is bad or that they don’t care about their partner. Often, someone feels a deep need for more affection, attention, or understanding, and if they’re not getting it, they might look elsewhere to fill that gap. 

This doesn’t justify cheating, but it highlights the importance of open communication and emotional connection in a relationship.

For many, emotional closeness is just as crucial as physical intimacy. When someone feels ignored or misunderstood, the temptation to find comfort with someone else can become strong. 

Both partners can benefit from regular check-ins, sharing feelings, and supporting each other. A healthy relationship gives both people a chance to express their emotional needs without fear of being judged or dismissed.

2. Low Self-Esteem Can Drive People to Cheat

Sometimes, cheating is less about the relationship itself and more about personal insecurities. 

People struggling with low self-esteem may cheat to feel validated or attractive. The attention from someone new can temporarily boost their self-worth, making them feel desired and important. 

However, this sense of worth is often short-lived, leading to guilt and even lower self-esteem afterward.

Building confidence and self-worth from within can make a big difference. Relationships built on mutual respect, where both people feel valued and secure, are far less likely to face these issues. 

Learning to recognize and address personal insecurities in healthy ways, like through communication, self-care, or therapy, helps people avoid seeking validation in damaging ways.

3. Some People Cheat Due to Thrill-Seeking Behavior

For some, cheating is about seeking excitement or adventure outside their usual routine. 

The thrill of something “forbidden” can create a rush, making the act of cheating feel exciting and new. 

This doesn’t mean these individuals don’t care about their partners; rather, it points to a desire for novelty or stimulation that isn’t being satisfied in their current situation.

Healthy ways to bring excitement into a relationship can help prevent this. Couples can try new activities together, take spontaneous trips, or even find ways to surprise each other. 

Keeping the relationship fresh can fulfill the need for excitement without crossing boundaries.

4. Opportunity Can Lead to Cheating

For some, cheating happens simply because the opportunity presents itself, and they act on impulse. 

Being in a situation where temptation is high—like at a party, a work trip, or even online—can lower resistance, especially if there are no immediate consequences. 

In these moments, curiosity or a lapse in judgment can push someone to make a poor choice that they may later regret.

Opportunity alone doesn’t cause cheating, but it can play a big role. Strong boundaries help prevent these situations from leading to mistakes. Recognizing risky situations and choosing to avoid them can help build trust and keep a relationship safe. 

Knowing one’s limits and sticking to shared values is a way of respecting the relationship, even when temptation arises.

5. Some People Cheat Due to Lack of Commitment

In relationships where commitment feels shaky or unclear, cheating can sometimes occur as a way of testing the waters outside the relationship. 

Without a clear sense of commitment, some might question their options, especially if they feel uncertain about the relationship’s future. Exploring options with others becomes tempting, particularly if there’s a lack of clarity or trust between both partners.

Clear commitment, open conversations, and honest communication make a big difference. When both people feel secure and committed, the need to seek outside attention usually lessens. 

Talking about future goals, understanding each other’s needs, and making clear promises can strengthen commitment and build a sense of security.

6. Unresolved Relationship Issues Can Lead to Cheating

Arguments, misunderstandings, or issues that go unresolved in a relationship can lead to frustration. 

Over time, these lingering issues can create distance, making someone more open to seeking comfort with another person. 

People often turn to cheating when they feel that their relationship problems aren’t getting solved or taken seriously, hoping that a new connection might offer relief or distraction.

Addressing relationship issues head-on is important. Regular, honest conversations about what’s working and what isn’t helps prevent bottled-up feelings that might lead to harmful choices. 

Both partners benefit from creating a space where concerns can be openly shared, helping to solve issues before they create rifts in the relationship.

7. Some Cheat Due to Personal Growth Differences

Sometimes, people grow in different directions. As personal goals, interests, and values shift over time, partners can feel disconnected. 

One person may start to feel out of sync with the other, leading them to seek someone who aligns better with who they’re becoming. Cheating in these cases is often a result of feeling misunderstood or no longer on the same path.

Maintaining a close connection, even as people grow and change, helps prevent this gap. Sharing dreams, setting new goals together, and finding common ground keeps a relationship strong through personal growth. 

Partners who actively work to grow together, respecting each other’s journey, often feel more united and less tempted to look elsewhere.

8. Some People Cheat Out of Boredom

For some, routine and familiarity in a relationship can lead to feelings of boredom. 

As time goes on, the spark and excitement that existed at the beginning may start to fade, leaving a desire for something fresh or different. 

Cheating then becomes a way to escape the everyday routine and feel alive again through a new experience or connection.

Finding ways to keep things interesting together can make a huge difference. Couples who keep trying new activities, exploring shared interests, and making time for fun often feel more satisfied and connected. 

A little effort to break the routine can keep the relationship vibrant and fulfilling, reducing the risk of wandering eyes.

9. Cheating Can Sometimes Be About Revenge

After feeling hurt or betrayed by a partner, some people cheat as a way to get back at them. 

Feeling ignored, mistreated, or even disrespected can lead someone to act out of anger or frustration. 

Revenge cheating often doesn’t come from a desire for someone new but rather from unresolved pain or resentment within the relationship.

Healthy ways to address hurt feelings, like open and honest communication, can help resolve conflicts without damaging trust. Talking through issues and expressing emotions directly is far more productive than seeking revenge. 

Mutual respect and understanding can repair wounds and keep both partners feeling valued and respected.

10. Cheating Can Be Linked to Impulse Control Issues

Impulsive behavior can lead some people to cheat, especially those who find it hard to resist urges or control sudden desires. 

People who struggle with impulse control might make quick decisions without thinking through the consequences. This lack of self-control can be risky, especially in situations where temptation is present.

Working on self-discipline and learning to handle impulses can strengthen both individuals and relationships. 

Setting personal boundaries, reflecting on decisions, and thinking about the impact on a partner can help someone make choices they won’t regret. 

Self-awareness and mindfulness in a relationship can foster stronger, more thoughtful connections.